Thursday, August 11, 2011

Exhausted

So I had surgery on Tuesday,
to essentially "save the baby".

It has been exhausting, mentally and physically.
I don't know how people can be on bed rest for months and months.
I for one am fed up with it.

I consider myself pretty independent.
I hate having to rely on other people for stupid petty things,
like getting me a glass of water or making me food.
Yes, I am not allowed to do any of the above,
along with many other things.

Put that and actually being in physical pain together,
BAD combination.
I am waiting for the physical pain to go away.
So that I can at least sit in a chair and not be in pain,
or even walk around for longer than 10 minutes
without having to rest for 2 hours after those 10 minutes.

It is frustrating. It is even more frustrating having my husband gone.
Having him be so busy that I don't get to talk to him until
10 at night sometimes.
I know I know, it comes with the territory.
But right now, I am fed up and sick of it.
I didn't sign up to be pregnant alone, let alone
have to go through all of these god awful issues alone, too.

Having to be in the hospital literally all day.
Not being able to feel my legs for a good portion of that day.
The physical pain after. God, I hope it gets better.
I can't do this for 7 more months, especially alone.

I don't mean to go on and on. I'm just frustrated.
I am stuck in bed 24/7 with no real connection to the world.
No real connection to my husband.
I get irritated so easily.
All I want to do is be able to go outside, to come and go
as I please again.

Please let this pregnancy get easier, pleaseee!

2 comments:

Reccewife said...

I'm sorry you're having such a rough go of it!
Reading your post made me think of another blog I follow where she's a military wife who has been detailing her last very long almost entire pregnancy of bed rest. Maybe it will inspire you? http://erinlive13.blogspot.com/2011/08/light-at-end-of-tunnel.html
Take care!

Jeanna said...

Thank you for the sweet comment on my homecoming post! It was such an amazing day, and you'll get yours, too! It seems SO horrible in the beginning, just because it's hard not having him a phone call away, but at the same time so so so rewarding. You have so much more to deal with than I did, but you are going to do great! It's gonna go by a lot faster than you thought.... Try not to wish these days away and just enjoy your little baby :) Congrats by the way! I'm so excited for you!