Pink Eye

So just my luck, I woke up Thursday and my eye had been bothering me alll day. It was itchy and watery and I had a headache behind my eye the entire day. But I am assuming it wasn't red because no one said anything to me. When I got off of work though, I came home and was doing stuff. Well I glanced in the mirror hanging on the wall just like I always do, except my eye was sooo red. It looked like I got beat up massively, but just in that one eye. So I go to Giant Eagle after everyone told me it was probably pink eye and I asked the pharmacists just to see what she would say, and sure enough she said it was probably pink eye. She said there was a Quick Clinic next door, but who has money for that? Not me...So I just bought some stuff from the store. It has seemed to be working, my eye isn't red and itchy anymore, but I still have these horrible headaches only on the right side of my head where the pink eye was...Needless to say I haven't done much the past couple of dayys :(

All Aloneee on a Wednesday Night

So my boyfriend is hanging out down in West Virginia tonight for work, which equals complete boredom for Lauren. You think I would be used to him not being here already between all the crazy hours he works and drill one weekend a month, but no. lol, somebody has to make the money, cuz it clearly isn't me right now.

On that note though, I finally went to training today for work. After all the waiting and other stupid stuff I have had to do, I am finally doing my training. Today was boring though, just got to sit on my butt for 5 hours and pretty much do nothing. My training lady, Dee, she is pretty awesome! So I am actually excited to go to work tomorrow.

I recently joined the FRG at my boyfriends company Christmas party. I am actually a little too excited about it, just because I will finally be able to meet some people & make friends down here. Granted its an hour and half from our house, its still okay. Plus i'll be able to make friends with everyone if he ends up deploying, which he is still trying so hard to do.

I also just discovered that the community college down here, Columbus State Community College, has a radiography program at it. I am already enrolled at OSU for Winter quarter coming up, but I am still so undecided about it there. And I really don't know who to talk to about it. If I talk to my family or friends, they are all going to be biased because they want the football tickets at Ohio State. And school starts January 3rd....I really feel stuckk & don't know what to do still.

The Ohio State University: Orientation Day!

So I went to my orientation at The Ohio State University yesterday, I start school January 3rd. I was so excited when I applied and even more excited when I actually found out I got in. Going to orientation yesterday though changed my whole perspective on going there. I actually don't want to anymore, but what choice do I have? No other schools down in this area have the degree I am going to school for, so I am kind of stuck. Here are the reasons why I'm not so excited anymore...

1. The campus is hugeeee! Going to Akron, I thought that was a decent size, but I knew where everything was, so it wasn't bad. We did a walking tour, in the freezing cold by the way, and it didn't help at all. Then after I met with my advisor, all I had to do was get my Buck ID. That was a mission all on its own. Instead of meeting back up in a place with everyone, they send you off on your own. So i walked and walked all over campus until some lady finally told me how to get to the union, and I remind you again - it was freezzingggg! Then after I got my Buck ID, I had no idea how to get back to my car. It was just a diasaster.
2. When I met with my advisor, I was expecting to take Anatomy 2 or something similiar and stuff relating to my degree. Nope! Apparently Ohio State requires you to take more stupid ass classes than neccessary. I have to take a History of Rock and Roll class, I mean seriously. My major is Radiology, WTF does the history of Rock and Roll have to do with anything?? And at Akron, I was done with math. In fact, I was done with everything except Anatomy 2 before I could apply to the program. Coming to OSU was kind of a smack in the face, and my advisor was so unhelpful, it was rediculous.
3. I am probably going to be in school way longer than I expected now, which I am not happy about. I am seriously to the point where I want to just say fuck this and quit. But I can't, and I am trying to get done with school as fast as possible. I promised myself my dad would see me graduate college, and I am trying to keep that promise, as hard as it is.
4. Everyone I know is so excited for me that I got into Ohio State, I feel like I can't let them down now. How do I live up to standards when I am so unhappy with my decision to go there. And lastly, my boyfriend has been my #1 cheerleader since the beginning of our relationship and he still is. Everytime I get discouraged he has picks me up. I don't want to let him down, not only him though, I don't want to let everyone else down, but mostly I don't want to let myself down. I know I can do this, but how do you keep doing something when your so unhappy with the decision?

I know it was just orientation and I am hoping things get better in the first couple of weeks when school actually starts. But we'll seee!!

-------

On a better note, when I came home from orientation yesterday there was a sticker on the door from UPS saying they delivered a package to us and it was in the office. Well I know I didn't order anything so I just assumed Josh bought something offline. So I texted him and told him he got a package and I told him where it was from. He immediately called me like, "Did you open it??" "Well don't" I would of never guessed it was anything for me if he wouldnt of acted like that. So I had to wait until he got home before he would let me open it, because I had to give him his Christmas present early because he almost bought what I got him, so he let me have part of mine early. So sure enough he cuts it open and its my ownnn Carhartt Jacket! I was so excited, I'm still excited. And its a womans Carhartt so its not hugee on me, which I didn't even know they made womans Carhartt's. But they dooo, and I am the proud new owner of oneee :) :)

Will Things Ever be the Same??

Wow! So it has been a long time since I have actually blogged. So much has happened since October to now. I picked up my life and moved to Columbus to be with the man I love more than anything. It has been great so far, my only wish, that I could of brought my friends and job with me. As much I hated and complained about my job, I miss the people I work with. We were together so much, they became like family to me. I ususally saw them more than I saw my own family. I don't neccesarily miss the job, just my "family" there. And my best friends, thats a whole different story. I moved down here and I don't know a single person. Everyone of my friends is back in Akron, and I have already missed my best friends birthday. It sucks. Granted I am only 2 hours away from everyone, it is still not as easy to just come home. Coming home means the gas to go back to Akron, a place to stay while I am there, and time to see everyone so no one gets mad. It's almost like a competition, if I don't see one person but I see another, they get mad. It's frustrating...

And my best friend is mad at me, she might not admit it, but I know she is, because I would be mad too. Me moving was for the better, but it still isn't the same. We have already grown apart. We don't talk much anymore, even before I left we didn't talk much. Her resentment was buidling before I even left. I can't really say anything because I am the one who chose to leave. But I do miss her and I hope things change soon. I know we might not stay best friends like we were, but she is the only person who knows me in and out, she knows when I am angry, even when I lie and say I am fine, she knows I am lying. Friendships like that are hard to find, and I hope we can get past this "bump" in our friendship and move forward.

Can't Shake This Feeling

So lately I have been in a mood. I can't really describe this mood, but it was starting to affect my life.

I realized though the root cause of this mood, my boyfriend was coming home, but he would quickly be leaving again. Not as far this time, but still leaving my day to day life again, at least for a couple of months. With that being said, I carried this mood around with me all weekend, I don't know what finally made it click in my head, but it took until Sunday night when he left my house for me to actually realize, I'm a idiot. I have this amazing man who loves me unconditionally, and sure he wouldn't be home for long, because sooner than later he is going to have a new home. But I want to enjoy the time that I do have left with him, and it isn't like I won't be able to see him, and chances are, well hopefully, I will be moving to this new home of his too, which would make it our home :)

I'm not the brightest person sometimes, but I'm glad he understands. I promise from today and on, I will not let him moving upset me. I love this man more than anything! And eventually we will begin our life together!

Oh and PS - Send lots of good luck wishes, he is interviewing for a big kid job!! :) :)

4 Months Stronger

Dear Army,
Boyfriend and I defeated you! Our four month seperation is almost complete. My baby will be home in 4 days, count them, 4 days!! I am beyond excited! I can't wait to see him, and kiss him, and just hold him. He is my absolute best friend, and we made it through this little adventure so easily. I've had my ups and downs and so has he, but we came out of this stronger then ever. The statement, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder", is such a true statement. I just can't wait to see him, and see where the future goes :) Wish us luck with him getting this job opportunity and us hopefully moving!!!

The Story of Us!

Josh and I actually went to grade school together, a little Catholic School named Christ the King (which is now North Akron Catholic). He was a grade below me, the same as my god-sister and best friend. I didn't like him when we were little, I thought he was annoying and stupid, haha sorry babe! We never really hung out much or talked for that matter, only when we absolutely had too. I left Christ the King to move onto high school. I don't think I seen or talked to him anytime after that. Well we had been friends on good ol' Facebook because lets face it, everyone adds everyone if they knew who that person was just to have friends, but we never talked to each other. I had a status up on Facebook one day, it was the end of April of 2009, that said something along the lines of "Playing beer pong with the friends" well he randomly commented on my status saying "Win one for me." I just thought to myself that was random, but went with it like "okay." About a week or two later, mid May, Josh popped up in my Facebook chat asking if I had won a game for him? We ended up talking for a few minutes and he gave me his number and invited me to a party he was having at his house. For whatever reason I actually saved his number in my phone, but I had no intentions on going to this party he was having.

A couple hours later, I went to my best friend Jenner's house to pick her up and go do something. I don't remember if we actually had plans and they fell through or if we were still trying to find something to do. And just an FYI this was back in my alcoholic days, all I did was drink. But we were sitting on her front porch, and all I remember saying is "Oh, this kid I went to elementary school with invited me to his party." And she asked who he was and what not, all I remember her saying is "Umm..Lauren, a house full of Army dudes, were goin!!" So I called Josh up and told him we were gonna stop by, he gave me his address and we were on our way. When I found the street, of course I drove right past his house, WITH my GPS because thats just what I do, haha. After all was said and done, we got out of the car and the only thing I remember thinking was "What the hell is going on??" Josh was walking around smoking a cigarette and had a gun on each hip. All I kept thinking was, "WTF did Jenner get me into??" haha.  The night turned out to be not to bad. I started to see alot of him within the next couple of weeks. He has this amazing comfy chair on the front porch of his house, that I always threatened to steal, but we spent many long hours in this chair.

He accepted me for me. After I told him all about my past, he still didn't care. He liked me for me, and I didn't know how to react to that. So many people get scarred off when I tell them that I have been married and have a son, but not Josh. It took me a while to open myself up and to be able to actually trust him, but he never showed me that he couldn't be trusted. We had this on again off again romance going for a while. We actually started to "date" for a couple weeks, then he told me he was still talking to his ex-girlfriend and he didn't know what he wanted, so we "broke" up. I am not gonna lie, I was a little messed up about it, here I was putting all this effort into him to just have it thrown back into my face. We didn't talk for about 2 weeks after that. I went on with my life as if he never existed, then he called. And ever since then, we have pretty much been inseperable.

I gave up on being in love, the idea of love, the idea of getting married and having babies. I was convinced I would be single and alone forever, then along comes this amazing man who treats me like a princess. It was almost as if it was too good to be true. Josh coming into my life is a blessing in disguise. I really couldn't ask for a better man or a better best friend. Through all the ups and downs he is always there, and is usually always on my side. For that I am forever grateful. I love you baby!

Such A Great Cause!

I felt this deserved to be checked out. Mrs. P is a fellow blogger and the information in the post that she posted is incredibly useful and all such great causes.

 alittlepinkinaworldofcamo.blogspot.com  <----check out the links she has posted!! Its for a great cause!

Missouri Trip Number Two

August 6-8, 2010: On August 6th, I flew into the Lambert-St. Louis Airport to spend the entire weekend with my love. I left Cleveland around 6:30pm and got into Chicago around 7:30pm. I thought for sure I was going to miss my connecting flight to St. Louis and I was freaking out but then I realized the time went back an hour so I had just enough time to get to my next gate. Well I made it right on time to my gate, only to find out our plane is broken and has been delayed. After waiting about 35 minutes they finally let us board and were on our way to St. Louis. I was supposed to land in St. Louis at 9:15 and Josh was picking me up from the airport. I finally landed around 10pm, only to text Josh to tell him I made it, for him to tell me he was not there yet. He said he had started drinking and was about 20 minutes away from the airport. I couldn't be mad because I was actually the late one getting in because he said he didn't leave until I left out of Chicago. Only to see him standing at the end of the exit terminal waiting for me, with open arms of course :) We picked up my luggage and started making our way back to the hotel room.

While were in the car driving to the hotel he tells me about the moment that he had. He went to check into the hotel only for the girl to tell him they couldnt find his reservations, ended up getting a room anyways. He goes up to the room only to realize he drove to the WRONG hotel. I was cracking up. Luckily he used to Army as an excuse and got out of his other reservations at the hotel we were supposed to be at. He then decides to break to me that he is trying to take someone else in his classes spot on a deployment, that is half way through the tour already, and that he would be leaving literally two weeks after he graduates from BOLC. I was NOT a happy person, at all. Luckily though someone else got picked to take the spot. He isn't happy about it, but I am. We make it back to the hotel and go swimming in the pool outisde for a little bit and eventually went and got food.

The next morning we were up way early to go to Six Flags. I was pumped because my trip to Cedar Point with my friends turned out to be horrible. Josh made sure that I actually had fun this time around, he is such a doll baby. As we were waiting in line for a ride called the Superman, a little girl passed out in line and Josh came to the rescue because no one else bothered to do anything. I had a proud girlfriend moment. We rode every rollercoaster except for one and that was only because it was miserably hot and the line was crazy long for the last ride. So we headed over to the waterpark, but ended up not staying because it was packed. We got some lunch, went and checked into a new hotel and took a nap. He took a really long one, while I showered and watched Shark Week on the Discovery Channel. I finally woke him up, and we went and got in the pool for a while. I had already did my hair, so I didn't want it to get wet at all. Well I apparently made some friends, a group of little boys who were between the age of 8 and 10 maybe. They all had the hots for me, which I found amusing. Josh was getting jealous, haha. After swimming, we went back to the room and got ready to go out to dinner. Ended up eating at a legit Mexican Restaurant. I wasn't very impressed with their food. But my margarita was great. After dinner we ended up going to this local bar in town. It was probably one of the best nights ever. They had a band playing a variety of music and they were good too. The environment was so diverse though, you could it was the only decent bar in town. We ended up closing the bar there and went back to the room and crashed out.

Sunday we went and toured the Aneheuser Busch Brewery in St. Louis. Sweetest thing ever, not only was the tour itself free, but they gave you free beer before and after the tour. We got to go through the entire beer making process from start to finish. We even got to witness a baby budlight. Bud has a born on date on each bottle or can, and well that can was born that day (hence, a baby budlight). It was a once in a lifetime thing to see something like that. I throughly enjoyed it. We then made our way back to the airport because I had to leave to come back home. This is not our first time we had said "see you later" to each other, but I still manage to cry everytime I have to leave him or he leaves me. And this time being no different, I of course was crying my eyes out walking into the airport after having to leave him. I hate having to see him walk or drive away from me, but this time I was the one walking away from him, but it didn't make it any easier. Especially with having to go back to reality the next day with work and school.

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Apparently the Clysdedale was excited to see me. haha

Baby Busch's :)

Me and Boyfriend before going out <3

The Wagon the Clydesdales pull

Me and the boo outside the building!

My First Visit To St. Louis

Warning: this may be long :)

So 2010 has probably been one of my best but worst summers ever. The worst because my boyfriend has been gone literally alll summer long and is still gone. But the best because I got to travel a lot!! I got to see and do some of the best things that I would have never done in a million years. Here is my first trip of the Summer, I have a couple more to document, since I got behind and just been really busy.

July 31, 2010 I got off work early that Saturday afternoon, I was supposed to work until 6 but got to leave at 4 because we were just standing around doing absolutely nothing. I texted Josh, just joking of course, if I leave now i'll make it to St. Louis by like 3am and could be there for like 4 hours. He comes back with 4 hours is better than no hours, so I spontaneously got in my car and drove all the way to St. Louis. I made it all the way to St. Louis just fine, even though I-70 is a 400 mile long drive with nothing but cows and corn to look at. Once I got into St. Louis, the address Josh had given me for the hotel turned out to be an address of a legit house in the hood, and when I say hood I legit mean hood. So here I am driving around in circles trying to get back to a main road, found a BP gas station. I had this bright idea that I would stop and ask for directions, mind you its a Saturday night around 11pm Central Standard Time, I pulled into the parking lot and I was the only white person probably in the next 5 mile radius. I can usually handle my own but I legit feared for my life rollin through the hood in downtown St. Louis. It was definitly an experience. After arguing with Josh about where I was at and driving in circles ten different times I finally found my way back to a main road. Josh ended up meeting me on the corner of the road I was coming down and ended up driving to the hotel we stayed at. We were both irritated with one another but I hadn't seen him in 3 weeks. So once I calmed down and changed my clothes and made myself somewhat presentable, we went out to the bars in downtown St. Louis. Let me tell you how underdressed I was, I had on jeans and a black tank. Everyone else around us was actually dressy dressed up. I wasn't expecting it to be so formal like. We went into this first bar that was packed and was playing techno music, the wait to get a beer at the bar was outrageous. Me and Josh were looking around and they no shit had gogo dancers in cages. Josh looked at me and was like, Let's Go!!! I couldn't help but laugh. We ended up going to this Irish bar that played country music, and in Missouri you can still legally smoke in bars and restaurants (I don't know what Josh is gonna do when he comes home). We both had a shot of Jack Daniels and Jack and Coke, then we went back to our hotel that just so happened to be the old Union Station. Like, the very first train station ever invented, they turned it into a hotel, but left alot of the structure still up, it was really neat. I enjoyed it!! We ended up going to this bar that was in our hotel and eventually went back to our room and went to sleep in the biggest most comfortablest bed ever. I fell in love with this bed.

Union Station, St. Louis, Missouri

The old roofing from Union Station that they kept up

The next morning we woke up real early, got breakfast in the shopping plaza inside the Union Station. We then went and visited St. Louis. We drove down to the Mississippi River and the Arch. The Mississippi was raised up high that day, it was flooding out into the road and sidewalk. As we were walking we noticed a parking lot entrance and a set of stairs that led right into the river. We were both highly confused about this, and then we see and random fire hydryant just chillin in the river. We then came to the conclusion that it had to be a parking lot at some time before and the Mississippi just raised higher and higher over the years, but why wouldnt you block it off or something?? It was just random as can be. We drove all around St. Louis, saw a bunch of neat things and then it was about time for me to get back on the road to come home to good ol' Ohio. All in all I was there for like 13 hours I believe. So my spontaneous drive to see my baby was definitly worth the 9 hour drive.

The steps leading into the Mississippi River

The Arch :)

Me and My Babe

Im Backkk!!

After forgetting my password foreverr, I am finally back!! Expect some updates laterrr :)

I LOVEEE Surprises :)

So this past weekend, the 23,24 & 25 my boyfriend came home. He drove all the way from Fort Leonard Wood, Missouri to good ol' Ohio. 684 miles to be exact and he did it in 9.5 hours. I was at the Red Fox with my broski Alvin and guess who met me there :) It was about 1:30 in the morning when he got in and we were inseperable the whole time he was here.

Saturday, we were gonna go surprise his dad but when he called he found out his grams was in the hospital and it was her birthday. We went to visit her and she was in such good spirits. Everythings okay now and she went home since, luckily. Then we went to visit his other grandma, she was soooo excited to see us, mainly him, lol. She is such a sweet woman, and Josh takes after her so much. Thats definitly where alot of his outspokenness comes from.

We then went to the Soap Box Derby for a little bit and met up with his Aunt and Uncle. Of course, Josh ran into people he knew, except I knew them too, but I was like 12 the last time I saw them, ha. After the Derby, we came back to my house and went swimming for a little while. It was sooo nice to have just me and him time, don't get me wrong, I love his family and seeing them but its nice to have him all by myself.

After swimming, we went to the Italian Fest and met up with his pops. Its probably one of my favorite things ever during the summer. I love italian food and im italian so it doesn't get any better than that. It had been raining all day long though so there wasn't that many people down there. But we still had fun and I got to eat some amazinggg pasta :) We thennn went downtown to Brubaker's and met up with his friend Bryant. Eventually we ended back up at the Red Fox. I don't know how we both managed to stay up until 2:30 am cuz we were both dead tired, but we did. And the next morning we both slept until 10am and he had to leave at noon to go back :(

Needless to say, I love him more than anything. Especially because he drove almost 1400 miles in 3 days just to spend a little bit of time with me, and of course his family ;) And for the next month and half I only have to go 2 weeks at a time without having to see him, because I am either going to St. Louis or he is coming back home. I'm getting spoiled and I love every minute of it.

Passing This Storm

1. Ready?

Always...

2. What did you do today?

Woke up around 9, took a shower, did my hair, got my passport - aka: my mug shot photo taken for Jamaica, ate some lunch with the parentals, finished my paper for class, went to class, and now I am about to go to bed.

3. What is your favourite memory from the weekend that just passed?

I really can't remember what I did this past weekend, thats horrible. ha


4. Who was the last person to send you a text?

Dominique

5. Do you love anyone?

I do :)



6. What are you doing at the moment?

Catching up on past episodes of the Bachelorette, I am a little behind. Then going to bed.


7. Where was the last place you went shopping?

Military Surplus Store


8. How do you feel about your haircut?

I actually need a trim and a dye job....baddddllyyyy


9. Where do you work?

At a grocery store, being a manager.

10. Last thing you ate/drank?

Waterrr

11. Do you wish you were someplace else right now?

I wish I was with my baby right nowww :(


12. Do you have any pet peeves?

Yess, its not good.

13. Do you have any expensive jewelry?

That I do, I love jewelry

14. What are your summer plans?

Well summer is half over, but I have a very exciting month planned ahead. I get to go visit my boo in a couple weeks, then 2 weeks after that I am going on a cruise to Jamaica and the Grand Cayman Islands and then I am going back to seee my baby before fall semester starts.

15. Do you like math?

Ummm, NO! I hate math and english

16. How many hours on average do you work a week:

ughh, like 32-38
18. Favourite colour?

Pink, Black and Purple is growing on me


19. Favourite video games?

Ummm, the singing part in Rock Band, I suck at the rest. haha

20. Do you watch the Olympics?

I watched curling with the boyfriend. lol


21. Last restaurant you went to?

Umm, Brick House when boyfriend was home for the 4th. I don't get out much obviously.

22. Who was the last person to call you?

Mother.

23. What’s your sign?

Pisces


24. Do you have a favorite number?

5


25. Last time you did volunteer work or made any donations?

I actually make donations all the time at work, well whenever needed.

26.What do you spend the majority of your money on?

Billlsss and clothes

27. Where does your family live?

Ohio, Arizona, Florida, New York

28. Are you an only child or do you have siblings?

I have 2 older sisters

29. Ever been called a bitch?

Sure have.


30. Got any guilty pleasures?

Sure do

31. What do you wear to bed?

A t-shirt or a cami usually

32. What’s your take on socks and sandals?

If it isn't black socks and black sandals, don't do it....puhhleaseeee

33. Did you ever collect Beanie Babies?

Hahahhaa, yeahh. I actually have them in the basement still.

34. Ever bought anything online?

Sure have

35. Myspace or Facebook?

Facebook.


36. What kind of phone do you have?

Droid.


38. Do you sometimes wish you were someone else?

No, I like me :)

39. What are you wearing?

Leggings and an Army t-shirt

40. What are you listening to?

the TV

41. Last time you saw your parents?

An hour ago..



42. Do you have any talents?

Sureeee...lol

Much Needed Love

I feel like I need to take some time out and so appreciation to my favorite people in my life...

Boyfriend: You have been gone for 49 days or 1 month and 19 days, which comes out to be: •4,233,600 seconds •70,560 minutes •1176 hours •7 weeks..I get to see you in 16 days, only for the weekend - but I am not complaining, I am taking what I can get. I miss you more than words can say. I can't wait to have my sleeping partner back, I just don't quite sleep as good as I did with you there. I miss your laugh, and our name calling and our wrestling events. I miss doing your laundry and cooking for you. I miss our movie nights and going to bed really early on thirsty thursdays when all of our friends are going out. I miss our conversations we would have laying in bed. I miss you waking me up bright and early when you would have drill or PT, no matter how mad I was that you woke me up. I miss your "drill moods" and our car rides together, even though you never let me drive. I miss our Dairy Queen trips. I miss your smile and those killer baby blue eyes, I miss us beating ass in corn hole - only when were both on our game of course.

71 more days •6,134,400 seconds •102,240 minutes •1704 hours until October 1st when you graduate BOLC and your back in Ohio for good. I love you baby and I miss you like crazy!!

Best Friend: I miss you, I feel like I haven't seen you in forever. I don't know what is going on because I feel like you kind of have shut me out, but I want you to know I am here. Your my best friend and I wouldn't have it any other way, so don't push me away, I need you in my life.

Mother & Father: Words cannot express how grateful I am to have you as parents. We have our moments where we can not stand each other, but at the end of the day I will always love you. You not only are taking me to Jamaica on a cruise, but you are paying for me to continue to go to school because the government thought it would be cool to not give me any money for financial aid. I love you.

Marissa and Tracy: You are my sisters and I will always love you. We may do things to each other that may regret later, but we always get past it. Were sisters, we fight, that is what we have always done. But when it comes down to it, we are all always there for each other. I love you guys both and I don't know where I would be right now without you.

Kenny and Nick: You guys are like the brothers I don't have. You can always make me laugh uncontrollably and your always down for whatever whenever, usually. I am so thankful to have you both in my life and I hope it stays like this forever.

I love you all sooo much!

How To Be A Good Army Girlfriend

Step 1

Realize that being an Army girlfriend is much different than being a girlfriend to a civilian. Your relationship is restricted as many things will interfere with the time you get to spend with him.


Step 2
Accept that there will be chunks of time where you won't be able to see or speak with him. Soldiers are often swept away to train in the field, or go elsewhere for weeks of training. You'll be lucky if you get to talk to him for five minutes a day, if that.


Step 3
Learn to be independent. Should your soldier be deployed, you'll be without him for a year or more. If this is something you will have difficulty handling, find another man. Your boy will need your support while overseas, not your indecisiveness.


Step 4
Your soldier will most likely be very close with his friends especially if he has been deployed. It's important that you support and encourage this. These guys are very close and will do almost anything for each other.


Step 5
Expect him to be tired most of the time. Soldiers work long days. They often have strenuous Physical Training activities and work in the heat with several layers of clothing. There's nothing better than giving him a nice massage after work, or cooking him a nice dinner.


Step 6
Get used to hearing words and acronyms that you won't understand.


Step 7
Soldiers get up very early in the morning. Respect this and say goodnight early. If you are staying together, take the time to get up sometimes in the morning to make him coffee.


Step 8
Realize that the Army has to come first in his life, not you. It's not a normal job. He can't be late for work, he can't leave work if you need something and it may be hard for him to keep in touch with you during the day.


Step 9
If your soldier is staying in the barracks, understand that there are rules. There are typically no visitors allowed past 10:00 (that's 22:00!), he will probably have a roommate and you won't get to spend much alone time with him when you're visiting.


Step 10
Be proud of your man! What he's doing is not easy. The best thing you can do is be supportive, listen to him talk about his day and love him as best you can.

42 days

It has been 42 days since my baby has been in Missouri. 42 days seems like a million more then it really is. 24 more days until I get to see my favorite baby blues, my favorite lips and hug my favorite man. 24 long dayss. I am only going for the weekend, I'll get to St. Louis on Friday, 6 August around 8ish and leave Sunday, 8 August around 6ish. Having him here for his weekend pass for the fourth was amazing, I wish it didn't have to end. Just as I was getting used to him being gone, he comes home. Then as I am getting used to having him around again, he leaves. I balled my eyes out the whole car ride home, just like I did the first time when he left. So I can only imagine how I will be walking through the airport, eyes all puffy and red. But it is so worth it, anytime I can see my man is worth it, even if its only for the weekend. Exactly 80 days until he is done with BOLC and gradauted, 80 moreeee days. Ughhh, I can't look at it in days, I'll go crazy. So 12 Fridays, 12 more Fridays and he'll be back in Ohio, safe and sound.

Just A Thank You

So I know it has been a while, I have been busy with life lately. But I felt the need to share how my night went tonight. I went out with my best friend Jenner and our friend Sunny. We ended up meeting up with some mutual friends, then some more mutual friends we went to school with, including my favorite married couple, Kristyne and Mark, showed up to Johnny Malloys. We had some food, some beers, and 2 - I repeat 2 fish bowls later, we finally left. But right before I was planning on closing my tab at the bar I ran into my old art teacher from high school, Mr. P!! I had to ask him if it was still, "Pimp master P x3" haha. It's a nickname we gave him when I was a senior in high school. I was the daughter and he was the dad, it was a joke we had because he graduated the same year and same school that my dad did. Needless to say it was an easy class to pass, even though it was crafts. lol.

After all that happened, I tried to help Sunny play matchmaker with Jenner. Didn't work out as planned, but I have faith it'll work out. We left the bar we were at, and ended up going to meet up with Jenner's friend Katie at some random ass bar I never knew existed right behind the place we get wings with the gang. We were there probably a half hour before we left. Well Katies friend's brother was at the bar with us. I found out he was home for a week leave from California. He was in between his training and his deployment to Afghanistan. While we were getting ready to leave, I told Katie to get her friend because I felt compelled to say something. Everyone who knew me, including my best friend either thought I was trying to hit on him or to just get a free drink. When I got his attention, all I said was, "Thank you for serving and good luck." Her sister was like, "Aww, that was nice of you."

I guess Josh has wore off on me a little more than I thought. That is something he is famous for doing, walking up to veterans and telling them thank you. I never thought it would be me in that situation doing the exact same thing, without him even being here. I guess I just felt compelled to say something. After being with my boyfriend for as long as I have, I have discovered a new found meaning to military men and woman serving. They are amazing, no matter what branch of service they are in. So right there in that bar tonight, I felt the need to smile and say thank you to him. I never met the man in my life, nor will I ever see him again, I feel like he will remember at least me saying thank you to him, even if I am the only one. I just want the men and woman to know their duty to America does not go unnoticed.

absolutely love this..

I want a boy who will move the hair away from my eyes, and then kiss me. Who will hold my hand in line at the mall and make all the girls jealous. A boy who will sing to me at random moments. Who lets me sleep on his chest. I want a guy who will tell his family and friends all about me. Bring me soup or orange juice when I’m sick. I want a boy who is more goofy than romantic, but knows the right things to say at the right times. I want a boy who will call me 3 times a day if he went away. A boy who will apologize for calling too much, and no matter how many times I tell him its okay, he’d still do it. A boy who will let me gossip to him and just smile and agree with everything I say. A boy who will throw stuffed animals at me when I acted dumb and then jump on me and kiss me a million times. Who will bet kisses on who could beat who on at game. Who makes fun of me just to make me laugh. A boy who will surprise me with 25 cent ring and we could have contest of how far we can spit our gum. Who will take me to the park, put his hands around my waist and give me big bear hugs all the time. A boy who will kiss my neck, just to have a reason to tell me how much he loves my new perfume. I want a boy who, at night, who will dance in his pajamas with me. A boy who will take pictures in photo booths with me, someone who will never turn down a trip to the lake and who will play tag on the beach with me. A boy who could sit with me on the kitchen floor and eat sandwiches. Who will kiss me in the pouring rain. I want a boy who would try to teach me how to play the guitar, even if we just end up laughing at each other. I want a boy who will run his fingers through my hair, share his lollipops with me, and get along with all of my friends. Someone who would never be afraid to say I love you in front of his friends and someone who would argue with me about silly things just to make up. I want a boy who will take me to Target to just make fun of some of the stuff there. Someone who will kiss me at midnight on New Years and who will make funny faces at me when I’m on the phone. I want a boy who will count stars with me and be friends with my family. I want a boy who will stay home with me on a Friday night just to help me make dinner and watch movies together under the same blanket. Someone who will squirt water guns at me in the house after I’ve got him soaked. I want a boy who looks me the eye and tell me something serious, that was also funny and make me promise not to laugh. A boy who could make me laugh like no one else can. I want a boy who will hold me closer than normal when I’m sick, and would play with my hair. But mostly I want a boy who is my best friend and will always be there for me.

It's almost time...

So I don't ever work Sundays, I couldn't even tell you the last time I worked on a Sunday. But today I did because I'm taking the 4th of July weekend off because my baby comes home for a 4 day leave on Friday. The only bad thing is, by me working today, it means I am now working 9 straight days. Ughh..not very happy about that, and tomorrow will be day 5 of 9. But the end result on Friday will be well worth me working 9 days straight in the end.

I am beyond excited to see my boyfriend. It's been a month since I've last kissed or hugged him. Let's just say I am going to be a very happy girl this weekend. I just wish it could last longer then 4 days, but I am thankful that I even get these 4 days. So here's to 5 more days!!!

Saturday Night Bonfire

So instead of me typing out exactly what my best friend typed out about our Saturday night, I figured I'd just copy and paste and give her the credit.  Check her out ;)

Saturday night I went with my friends Emil, Nick, Jimmy, Emils' bro Josh, Lauren, Brandon & Brandons' girlfriend to a "bonfire." We were meeting up with Emils' friend Tim. It was out past Brimfield and into Suffield.. way out in the boonies. We turned off of 224 and as soon as we drove up a hill we see the bonfire on the left hand side of the road, prolly like 10ish feet away from the road. It was HUGE! Then we look to our right and see all the trucks & SUVs parked along side of the road in the grass on the dudes' property in front of his barn.

We pulled in, opened the doors to get out of Laurens' SUV and the smell of horse shit over-whelmed us. All we did was laugh. Lauren, Nick & myself started walking to the party and realized just how many people were standing around the bonfire then we looked around the barn and saw even more people just standing around, everyone with beer in their hands. People were playing cornhole. There was a beer pong table set up in the garage that was a 3-car garage with all the doors open with the radio inside playing country music.

This dude not only owned his own house, but owned the garage and I think there was 2 barns on his property.. let alone the property ACROSS the street. I was seriously in awe. We just stood there for 5 minutes to take it all in. I had never been to a real "country" like bonfire. Basically every guy had on them tan timberland type boots. Some guys had belt buckles. I even saw a guy in overalls.

I loved pretty much every minute of it. Emils' brother Josh went around the barn to use the bathroom and walks up to me "There's seriously cows just chillen in the pasture." Haha. I never thought I'd ever hear that sentence. We suddenly got the urge to go cow tippin' but they were inside an electric fence. (Smart move on the owners part. Haha.) In the garage was a nice lookin four-wheeler. Nick was like "And that'd be your four-wheelers daddy" because it's so much more bigger than mine. Haha. The owner of the property was riding around in a golf cart, with a beer in one hand, smokes in the other, and some chicks as passengers. Made me chuckle everytime I saw them.

When we were saying our goodbyes to everyone I saw 2 guys wearing the exact same shirt: the front of the shirt said "Duma Meats" and the back was just advertising Duma Meats. They were SO cute, I'm totally going to Duma Meats ASAP. I know who the Duma's are, they are truly an amazing family.. and they're oldest son is such a stud muffin. It's like everyone knew everyone. I only live not even 5-10 minutes away from Brimfield, Mogadore & Suffield but yet it was a whole-nother world. I SO much rather of grown up in the country than in Akron. I can't wait to move out to Brimfield. I'm seriously SO happy I didn't "settle" for a house that I found in Ellet. I woulda made the biggest mistake of my life. The only bad parts of the night was the Summer heat. I was miserably HOT even at 1am.. seriously 80 degrees at 1:00 in the morning is NOT needed in life. And I lost in every corn hole game I played, NOT cool.

Crazy Saturday Night

So this past Saturday I went out with my best friend to the Valley. We ended up meeting up with our friends Brittany and Lauren and also our new friend Amy. Our other friend Emil was supposed to have people over at his house that same night too, well turns out he ended up coming to the Valley with his friend Shane. We had a good night all night, no drama. Just had a nice chill night with my friends. After the bars closed, we ended up going back to Emil's house for a few. Thats when the night got ugly...

I was talking to Jenner and my friend Kayla and all I remember is Shane saying something to me from across the room and then he came over, picked me up over his shoulders, and all I remember is laying on the floor. Apparently he had dropped me, but he didn't just drop me, he dropped me hard into a corner of a wall, made me black out for a few minutes.

I have a battle mark on the back of my neck that I hope doesn't scar. And I have a pinched nerve and my spine is bruised up pretty bad. Lucky lucky me. I didn't go to the hospital until Monday night, and the doctors questioned why I waited so long to come in. Umm hello, because I hate hospitals and had hoped it wouldn't get any worse, but it wasn't lookin good. Now I have these God awful headaches because of that pinched nerve. The worst thing is, I guess their is nothing I can do except ice it and put a heat pad on it every hour.

Boyfriend kept me company while I was in the hospital since he couldn't physically be here :) so that made things a little easier. But I have to be 100% by 10 days because my mannn will be home on leave, so lets hope for the best!!!

Out with the old and in with the new

So I recently got a new phone, as in yesterday. It was time for my one year upgrade and I have been patiently waiting forever it feels like to upgrade. I used to have the Blackberry Tour, it was probably one of the best phones I have ever had. I never had an issue with it and I never had to replace it. Its the same phone that I have had for a year and still works great.

I just got the Motorola Droid. I really wanted the Incredible, but there is not one Verizon store that has it in stock. I don't know when the phone got so popular, but I guess it won't be back in stock until around July 20th, which is crazy. There is a new droid coming out next month sometime too. But it looks just the the Droid I just got, only the screen is bigger, no key board and something about you can hook it up to your high definition television. Why anyone would need to do that is beyond me and plus I am one of those people who have yet to get one of them tv's, lol. So I just got the original Droid.

It's hard getting used to, I dont know what apps I need or anything. Ha, I am usually pretty good with phones, but this one - not so much. The only thing I know how to do good is play my favorite game ever, Jewels, but that is only because boyfriend has had this phone for months and I used to play it on his all the time. I just hope I don't have any issue's with this phone, I hope its a trooper like my blackberry was. So we'll see I guess.

PS. 10 more days and my babe will be home for 4 days :)

Horrible everything

So as of today I have been in the worst possible mood. I really just want my babe back and well I can't have that. Yesterday was the first day I had a real conversation with him since this past Sunday. I know it may not sound like that long but for me its foreverrrr. I miss seeing his face, I miss hearing his voice, I miss him making fun of me. Ughhh, like I said, horrible mood. I know he is 684 miles away and has to make a new life while he is out there in Leonard Wood, I just feel like he has forgot about me back at home sometimes. I know its not true, well I hope its not true, but its how I feel sometimes. Or its just me in this shitty mood and I feel like everything is a million times worse than it really is. So I'm going boozing with my best friend/partner in crime tonight. It will either make me feel better or make it even worse, we shall seee!!!

On a better note, boyfriend gets a 4 day pass for the 4th of July in 13 dayyssss :) Thats probably the only highlight of my dayyy. Okay, im done. Just had to vent before I left to go out.

Movie Madness

So I don't have much else to do with my time, so I have been using Redbox quite a bit. Here is a few of the movies I have watched or plan to watch :)

Boyfriend very rarely watched girly movies with me so I guess I'm making up for it now.

Monday Rants

So I got my test back today, can I tell you how upset I was. Stupid stupid math class. I over thought everything. All the stuff that I knew how to do, I didn't get right, but the stuff I wasn't too sure on how to do I got it right. Its so frustrating though because when my teacher reviewed it, I had the right answer, I just did way more work than neccessary, like I said I over thought everything. But when I brought it to my teachers attention, he said because I didn't have the correct answer on the line provided it was wrong. I didn't completely fail it, but I didn't do nearly as good as I know I could have. It's just so frustrating. Hopefully all my other homework and quizzes help my grade, because its not lookin too hot right at this moment.

Anyways, so I have been working out like crazy the past couple of weeks. I'm not straining myself, just going to the gym every other day, some weeks everyday. But I'm not losing weight, I'm toning up and you can definitly tell, but my whole goal was to lose weight damnit. My friend David says its because I'm building muscle mass and it weighs more than actual body fat does. It's just frustrating. All I want in life is to go down a pants size. haha. Oh maybe by the end of summer if I'm lucky.

Those "other" days

So I'm finally getting into a routine of living life without my other half, although all it consists of is school, gym, work and sleep. The only other way I would have it is if my boyfriend was here too. But it still sucks, I've genuinely never missed someone so much. To have someone who loves you unconditionally and for you to love them just as much is the most amazing feeling in the world. He makes me smile even when he is 684 miles away from home. 3 weeks, 3 weeks until I get to hold him and kiss him again, even if it is only for a couple days.

I was told that the first week is the hardest, that once you get past the first week your golden. But I feel like that is a lie. Yeah, I had my moments the first couple days after he left but I was ultimately fine. Today though, horrible mood. I think its stemming from me going out with my friends last night though. I didn't go out with friends I talk to on a regular bases, so they didn't know Josh had left. So of course I get the twenty questions, where's your boyfriend? Oh, what is he doing in Missouri? Oh, that sucks, I'm sorry! I know they mean well, but its so frustrating. And the whole PDA stuff, I just want to smack people. Mainly because I can't kiss my boyfriend a whole bunch of times a day right now, so yes - it makes me a litttle bit jealous. ha, I can at least admit that much. But I'm hoping once I go to sleep and start another fantastic week tomorrow that my mood will be much better. I have to go back to being that strong girlfriend behind her man. Ha, I can't afford to have days like today, because I can handle four months just fine and I don't want my boyfriend to think otherwise. Some days are better than others, today was just one of those "other" days. ily babe!

Week 1, Done With

So we made it through week number 1. Only 16 more to go before he comes home for good. He'll hopefully be home in between all that time or I will for sure be making my way to Missouri whether he wants me to or not. haha. Its been an okay week suprisingly, I kept it together quite well. And I  intend on keeping it like that. I can talk to him and we attempt to see each other on the webcam, its still not the same though. I cant wait to just kiss him and hug him again. Sooonnnn enough!! :)

I have a test this morning, stupid Statistics. What kind of teacher only gives two test the entire session of class. A mid-term and the final. It doesn't help that I'm beyond lost in the class. I can't remember all them formulas and what not. Let's just pray I get at least a C so I don't have to take it over. Well, wish me luck!! lol

Rain, Rain Go Away

So the weather in Ohio has been so shitty the past couple of days, nothing but rainnn. I'm sick of it! I'm sick of this place, I'm sick of working and going to school everyday of my life. I'm finally making some decent money again, to the point where I can actually save some, which is a rare thing. But I'm just sick of dealing with stupid ass people who don't know how to read and count. I need a job that actually challenges me I guess. I just want a vacation, just a little 4 day getaway will do. But who knows if that will ever happen. I don't have a legit break from school until August and its only 1 week then fall semester starts. Okay I'm done complaining. lol

On a better note, I got to Skype with Josh last night. It's not the first time we've used to webcam, but it was probably the best time because the internet on post sucks, so the signal is shitty. I mailed him some stuff today. Thank goodness for USPS flat rate boxes or I would have had to pay $10 more than I actually paid because of the weight. Well I'm gonna go lay down, I'm just exhausted all the time now after 5pm...

Reality hasn't set in yet...

So boyfriend's been gone 3 days so far, and I'm pretty sure it has yet to sink in fully that he isn't coming home for a while because I got used to him leaving for a couple days at a time. But I get to talk to him and were working on the whole web cam thing. I'm more than glad I took his pillow, it smells just like him. It helps me sleep at night. All the fun stuff begins for him tomorrow, poor thing has to be up and ready at 0430.

On a better note, we had a cook-out for my dads birthday today. The old man turned 55 on friday. I'm just glad the rain held out because it has been raining non-stop basically since Friday. My middle sister never showed up until the party was over, kind of pointless to even come over - but whatever. It was good just to be around the family and friends.

My best friend Jenner and I finally went and saw Sex and the City 2 tonight. It was long and a little bit drug out, but overall it was good. It was good to get out and do something finally. But tomorrow's monday so that means school and work start all over, so night everyone!!

Couple not allowed to adopt...

An Italian couple were ruled unfit to adopt children because they wrote on their application, "prepared to take in up to two children...regardless of sex or religion..but not with dark skin." Thats stupid and rediculous, if your willing to take in children into your home and give them a good life shouldn't you be able to choose the race of your children you are adopting?? Read the article

Having to say good-bye to my Soldier

My best friend left me this morning to head off to Ft. Leonard Wood, Missouri for 4 months to do his Basic Officer Leadership Course or BOLC. I just hope the next 4 months fly by and hopefully I can go visit him because its basically like a 8-5 job Monday through Friday give or take a couple hours and weekends, but he's my heart and I already miss him.

He is actually driving from Ohio to St. Louis right now as we speak. He is staying in St. Louis for the night in a $150 hotel room. A little over the top, but thats my man and one of the reasons why I love him. Then tomorrow morning he will be driving from St. Louis to Ft. Leonard Wood. He'll get all checked onto post and what not, have the weekend to get the lay of the land. Figure out what he can do and what he can't do so that I can come down and see him as much as possible!!

The past couple days leading up to today were insanely busy. I had to pack all my stuff and get it out of his house. He had to pack all the stuff he was taking to storage, and then pack all the stuff he was taking to BOLC. He took sooo many civilian clothes, probably half his wardrobe. lol. All his friends laughed at him for taking that many civilian clothes, but he does what he wants.

I managed to sneak in presents in his stuff from me without him noticing and I hid his departure letter under the passenger seat. He calls me and says, "your a little trickster, how'd you sneak this stuff in without me seeing it?" haha. I wasn't gonna tell him about the letter under the seat until he got to St. Louis, but he found it trying to find something on the floor of his car. But I love him so its okay!

I was told I wasn't allowed to cry all day yesterday until this morning because he caught me crying while we were packing. Then he laughed at me all day and kept making jokes about it. But this morning I balled my eyes out, well all day long so far off and on. But he won't ever admit to it, but im pretty sure his eyes started to water, which is why he wouldn't let me have a long "see you soon" departure. He fought me about taking his pillow, but im so glad I did. It's the only thing that really gives me peace cuz it smells like him!

7 Days

So I'm down to my last 7 days with my love. It's all becoming so surreal that he is actually leaving. We started to pack up all his stuff in his room yesterday, its all just a little bittersweet. I knew it was coming for so long, but now its finally here. I had a minor melt down this morning right after class. I couldnt focus in class if my life depended on it. As soon as I got into my car, i just cried and he isnt even gone yet. But my bestest friend since I was 4 talked me out of it. She made me realize all the good things that will come out of this. She will more than likely be my go to person because she has been through this, and is about to go through it again with her husband, that is of course when talking to my other half isn't an option.

I bought a $1400 computer from Sony, just so I could be able to see him on the webcam as much as possible. Yeah I needed a new computer eventually, but he was the main reason I finally bought one. Now I am just paitently waiting on it to arrive. Well thats all for now, I have to go work on some little "projects"that I am trying to finish before Thursday morning.

I love you!!

22 friggin daysss

Yep, only 22 days till boyfriend leaves for Ft. Leonard Wood, Missouri. And i finally cried the other day. ha, im pathetic!

Josh Graduated!!

So on, 08 May 2010, my boyfriend graduated and commissioned from The University of Akron. I could not have been anymore proud of him! I have only been a part of his life for his senior year, but still it is such an amazing accomplishment!! He is officially now a 2nd Lieutenant in the United States Army!!

the guys swearing in as 2LT

getting pinned my his mom, derrick & his dad

first salute with derrick

him and i at dinner :)

I LOVE YOU BABYYY!! WAY TO GO!!

what a dayyy!!

so today i woke up in a great mood. i made the mistake of going home after class before i had to go to good ol' daves market. but i mentioned to my mother about maybe her and my dad helping me pay for school for the summer so i can get ahead and be done instead of behind. they say they want me to succeed in life, but yet they do not bother to help me. i dont see how you can not help your child get an education. i could understand if they really didnt have it, but they have the means to help me. i guess you could say they are greedy. but yet they have no problem spending money on other stuff, like a pool, im not complaining one bit about the pool because i will use it mostly, but still its the point. it seriously just makes me sick to think they can be so selfish. so as of right now, idk if im going to school in the summer or fall for that matter because financial aid insist you be 24 to be a dependent if your not married or have kids. well that means i still have to use my parents income, which doesnt help me at all because i get NOTHINGGG from financial aid because of them.

but my day got better luckily. i got a call from my old boss today at work!! he is originally from Africa and is also a minister. He left my work to go work for an organization called World Help (http://www.worldhelp.net/). Basically he is a missionary and travels all over Africa to help families and orphanages. Not only does he do amazing work, but he is one of the few people I actually look up to in this world. He alone is the person who helped me the most through what was the worst moment in my life. Without him, i honestly dont know where I would be at right now. He gave me the courage to do what I needed to do for myself and for that I will be forever grateful for. It has been almost a year since i have last seen him, but he called my job today and said he was going to be in Canfield on Sunday for a program they are putting on. Seriously made my day!! I cant wait to see him, talking to him just gives me a sense of comfort. I guess its his way with words. I would love for anyone to meet him!!

but thats all for now!! its back to the homework i go :)

Weekend in recap!!

So my boyfriend ,yet again, had to leave me for the weekend to play army. So I decided to take the time and be with my bestest friend ever because I missed her. Friday I worked until 10pm, like always. But the night was half bad, maybe its because i got a surprise phone call AT WORK from boyfriend. Its the little things that matter the most to me, you know, stuff like that. I swear it made my night. I am really not a hard perosn to please.

Saturday morning I worked for a girl at my job, only 730 to 12 though. Came home and did some serious cleaning in my rooms. LOL, yes i said rooms. They were a disaster zone. Then Jenner calls me up and asks if i wanna go to verizon with her. We ended up being there for hours. bahaha. but she got the droid and im jealous. Come one Juneee!! LOL. While I was getting ready to go out with Jenner, Kelly and Susie, my mom calls and tells me to come downstairs. Mom and Pops got me a set of PINK golfclubs!!! I was so excited. Not that I am the best golfer, but now i can go whenever I want cuz I dont have to use my dad's friends. And now I can spend time with my dad since he has been sick lately. After meeting up with Jenner and having some to-go beers, we met up with Kelly and Susie at this hicktown bar in Springfield. The way people were dressed in this place was from like the 90's or something; skirts, side ponytails, windbreakers. baahahaha. But Kelly was exra feisty because her bf's ex was there, which made things even more interesting. Somehow Kelly and I ended up karaoking Got Money-Lil Wayne, and Susie joined in and Jenner just laughed her ass off at us. It had to be one of the proudest moments with my friends. That song will never be the same anymore. And Kelly was sooo into it, which made it even better. Needless to say, the night was fabulous!!

Sunday, I was up way earlier then I should have been. I have been reading a book called The Last Song, by Nicholas Sparks. I absolutely love his books, I think I have almost every book he has written. I ended up finishing the book though Sunday morning. I have never cried while reading a book until that one. So Jenner and I decided to go do lunch and see the actual movie. We ended up not making it to the lunch part, well because we both suck at getting places on time, lol. But the movie was soo good too, made me cry. haha. After the movie, I seriously didn't come out of my bedroom except to move my car out of the driveway the rest of the day. I ended up taking a nap somewhere in all that time. Which is why I am up wayyy early.

Exactly 40 days today until my love leaves me for Ft. Leonardwood, MO. 40 days is not long enough, 40 days for him to be gone 4 months!! I knew all about this coming into this relationship, but I didnt think in the end I would end up falling in love with him like I have. And now it sucks and I hate it. But I am going to be the best girlfriend everrrr when he is gone :)

Heyyyy

So its been a while since i have been on here. Just wanted to stop by and say heyyy :)

Random Nothing-ness

You know what the best feeling in the world is? Having a best friend, that one person who loves you & never judges you no matter what you matter how badly you fuck up. Someone who you have endless conversations with and can communicate by just using your eyes. That one person who just walks in your house, opens the fridge and grabs whatever they want out. Lastly it’s that person who knows so much about you that they could ruin your life in a second. But you trust them with your life and you know that they will never ever do that no matter what.

She's my one person ;)

At some point, you've got to just jump. You've got to quit being scared of the "maybes" and "what-ifs". Quit cheating yourself out of the best thing that could ever happen to you. Quit cheating him of the same. Fall hard, fall long, and fall forever.

Our fingerprints dont fade from the lives we touch -Remember Me

dont be reckless with other people's hearts;; and dont put up with people who are reckless with yours

NYC

So my best friend, Jenner and I, decided to go on a random road trip over spring break. It was probably the time of my life, minus actually driving into the city. The taxi drivers are insane and it was sooo overwelming, and well i pretty much just wanted to cry. But other then that, it was sooo fun and i wanna go back. but instead of me uploading photos, i'll just send you right on over to Jenner's :)

http://bllueeyeess.blogspot.com/2010/03/my-trip-to-nyc-in-pictures.html <-----click that :)

plans for spring break

since i am not going anywhere for spring break, i have decided i am going to declutter my life. this would be a list of what i plan to get done during the week.

• clean my room top to bottom
• get rid of the clothes i no longer wear, im running out of room
• clean my desk off so i can maybe actually use it
• clean the hallway out
• get my nutrition project done, or at least half done
• start my med term project
• clean the car, maybe finally give it a wax
• see about getting rid of the car, i miss my fusion and want it back
• booze with my best friends
• visit with the family

thats all i can think of for now, but im sure i'll attempt to do even more. now lets just see if i can get it all accomplished :)

spring break has arrived

So for Spring Break I was supposed to be going to Vegas with the ladies, Jenner and Kelly, well that all fell through because someone has to be buying a house ;) haha. So then I was gonna go on a boozing adventure to Fort Myers, Florida with my father to visit our family down there, but my wonderful mother shot that idea down, damnnn herrr!! So now I'm stuck in the wonderfulness of Ohio for a week of slaving away at the work place and doing homework, while damn near everyone I know will be on vacation somewhere. Boyfriend leaves for Vegas Saturday morning, but he'll only be gone for half the week, thank goodnessss! :)

Las Vegas Skyline :)

Fort Myers, Florida :)

I was walking to class this morning and I realized I have to "move out" of the boyfriends house today or tomorrow. damn near half of my clothes are there, and all the stuff I use on a daily basis is there as well. I cant go 5 days without my stuff. haha. Speaking of boyfriend though, I have bascially been living there the past couple of weeks. But the way I see it is, I have to get my QT time in with him now because next month he will either been out of state for Army stuff or just busy in general with Army stuff so I will hardly see him.

Needless to say, my spring break will be not exciting at all, which blowssss :(

first nice weekend of the year!

So the weather is finally breaking in Ohio. In fact, the past weekend has been beautiful. The high has been 50, but trust me - going from like 10 degrees to 50 degrees, its great! I broke out the sandals and flip flops too finally. Thats a sure sign spring is on the wayyy :)

Saturday night we had a bon fire at the boyfriends house. The beginning of March and were having bon fires already, its a great thing. It was a good night though, my best friends Jenner, Kenny, Danny and Nick all came over, along with a whole bunch of his friends. Its sooo nice that my friends and his friends can all get along. That's a rare thing nowadays. Danny is a trip and he can mingle with anyone. Apparently, after Josh and I went to bed, Danny was getting ready to leave and I dont remember if he was trying to sit in the chair and missed it, or if he just straight fell. But Joey said it looked like it hurt, but he said he was okay. Thats the Danny I know and lovee. haha.

Sunday, after I did my weekly routine of doing boyfriends laundry, we went for a Sunday drive. We ended up driving down to Amish Country. I have never been down there before , nor have I seen a horse and buggy before. I've saw a horse and carriage, in fact I've ridden in one, but not an actual horse and buggy. I didnt think they still existed. But they do and it was soooo cute. I wanna ride in one. lol. We drove all around down there though, just site seeing. Got to see all the cows and horses and what not. It was all good until we were on our way home. Apparently the State Troopers were doing air radar and clocked Josh doing 74 in a 55, but there were no signs posted stating it was only 55 and we were just keeping up with traffic. So as we were coming around the corner, there were 3 State Highway Patrol cars and the Troopers out in the middle of the road flagging us over. We thought it was just a random stop, turned out not to be. Well Josh had his gun on him, and the Trooper had his hand on his gun while walking up to MY window. And mind you, I had to pee soooo bad. Pretty sure if the Trooper would of pulled the gun on us, i would of peed my pants. hahahaha. After waiting for like ten minutes for them to run and check all of Josh's information, he finally comes back, with a ticket in hand. Poor babyyy - he was mad.

So after we were finally able to leave, he goes to a gas station so I can go to the restroom, it was dirty and gross and someone was in it, and I didnt wanna use it anyways so we just left. Ended up getting lost, needless to say we took the scenic route home. And im pretty sure we wont be going on anymore Sunday drives :( Then we came home and we made a bangin asss dinner, then went to bed :) haha

That was my wonderful weekend.

ly

funniest shit ever

the past does not define you, the present does!!

that quote sticks with me so well right now. i just found out today that my ex is having a baby with his 17 year old girlfriend. honestly all i could do was laugh. i have no care or desire to give two shits about him or his life anymore. the only person i feel sorry for is the baby involved here, because chances are he/she wont make it or the baby will be taken into CSB custody. but whateverrr - thats his problem.

i could not be anymore happier that that chapter of my life is over. i look back now and im like what the fuck was i thinking, like honestly. im glad i finally woke up and walked away from that piece of shit. ha, okay im done!! just thought that shit was hilarioussss =)

the week from hell

so seriously these past two weeks have been hell. i've hit that point in the semester where i have no motivation to do anything. my comp 2 teacher is awful and i clearly just want to drop the class, but that is not an option. i have a paper due today, which is not finished. and i work the entire rest of the week. I had a test this morning and a test tomorrow in my other classes. i am so frustrated with life right now. i hate to ask for help, its the one thing i refuse to do, but i feel like i am all out of options....

last night Josh was like, "are you sure your not on your period? you dont ever complain this much." which he's right, i dont. im just not having a good couple of weeks. i havent figured out if its school, life, or both. but whatever it is, it needs to pass. this isnt me and i dont like feeling like this...all i want to do is sleep. idk if its the stress of things, but i just seriously want to sleep. i think my body is telling me im doing too much or something. im constantly tired. like right now i could go to sleep and i slept soo good last night too.

update: enough complaining, let me give an update on life. Josh's roommate Joey is proposing to his girlfriend on friday. the ring is absolutely beautifulll...she's a lucky lucky girl. lets just see if he can hold out until friday. haha. Josh and I are better then ever. I seriously love him beyond words. the next couple months though, i wont get to see him as much though because of ROTC and the Army. but he Commissions and graduates in May and i could not be any more proud of him. i loveee you baby babeee ;)

birthday celebrations

so mine and kennys birthday bash was great. i was actually early for once in my life to kennys house, but only because i didnt make it in time to go to dinner with the boyfriend. he was mad at me all night for that too. so many of my AMAZING friends showed up. lets see..the main ones of course, kenny, myself, jenner, danny, davis, and josh. then we got kyla and her friends. the entire household of joes house came. dominique, jennifer and mar mar stopped by. jeanetta made an appearance. marissa came! my favoritest neighbors/family in the world came, taylor, alvin and king. pretty sure i missed some people but thats the run down. i never made it onto the pong table, not even once. i was too occupied with talking to everyone. lol. go figure - put some wine in me and i just talk and talk and talk. speaking of wine though - i had this amazing wine glass that said "birthday bitch" on it and it held an entire bottle of wine. quite amazing. i almost finished two bottles of wine, before it got taken from me at the end of the night. i bought a case of beer also, that i never even touched, nor picked up. so kenny, you finally got your beer that i owed you. haha. i think i ended up leaving around 130. the booski came and picked me up because no one would let me drive, and all i had to drink was some wine, oh and whatever jennifer poured into my wine glass. haha. here's some photo's from the evening.

I was trying to leave but kept taking pictures. lol

Margo and Me
the vane block crew - i love themm

Husbandy & I - It was OUR birthdays :)

it's official, im 23

so my birthday was fantastic minus having to work. but i went to dinner with my closest friends, Jenner, Kenny, Danny, Jenn, Bryan, baby Kendra, Kelly, and the boyfriend Josh. We went to O'Charley's in the Falls. I had an amazing steak, it was sooo good. It was the first time Jenner, Kelly and I have all been together at the same time, so we finally got to document all of us having dark hair. Def wont be like this for much longer because Kelly is in stage one of going back to blonde, and i am starting to want my hair lighter again. Overall, the night was great. I love having ALL my friends together, minus Nick because he was a meany and couldnt get off work.

Brunette's ;)

After dinner was over Jenner, Dominique, Kathryn, and I went to BG Breez and to the Valley. Lets just say i was down for the count after we left the Breez all thanks to the ladies. Mainly Neeka, she was buying drink after drink for me. She claims it was pay back from her birthday. Pay back was an understatement. I slept in the car on the way home, Jenner had a photoshoot with me. And lets just say the bathroom floor turned into my bed. And the next day, I dont even have words for the next day. I was so miserable. Definitly the worst hangover I ever had..

Some of the bitches :)

All in all, the night was greattt. Birthday Party Saturdayyy :)